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Sunday, April 10, 2011

Honest Owen.....

Owen - such a good little man!

Helpful
Thoughtful
Affectionate
Kind

He is a terrific little champ, but he had a problem.

He lied!  Without thinking, he lied.  If he was asked something the first thing out of his mouth was the opposite of what happened.  It was just an automatic outburst of words. 

We were at our wits end to know how to solve this problem.  Many tears were shed (mostly mine) and many prayers were prayed.  We had stern talks and other forms of discipline, but that still didn't seem to touch the issue.

Finally, one night, after many tears and an hour of trying to get him to tell the truth, I called my absolutely wonderful Dad and was talking to him.  All the things he suggested, I had already tried.  So he said he would be praying.

The next morning, I woke up and the thought immediately came to me (from God, I'm sure) to make him a "Honest Owen" chart.

I let him pick stickers for the chart and explained how it would work.

*Every time the truth was told, he would get a sticker.  (this wasn't just for piddly things either)
*Every time an UNtruth was told, not only would he NOT get a sticker, he had to CROSS OUT a sticker he had already earned and would need to re-earn it.
*When the chart was full we would take him to Dairy Queen and he could pick out anything on the menu. (as HUGE treat, as we rarely go anywhere to eat)

I told him that the devil wanted more than anything for him not to please Jesus and for him to lie.  I reminded him about Sir Sinful (Mrs. Jackson taught at Children's Chapel) that sits on our shoulder and tells us things that aren't true.

"There are times that you can even say, **NO** to the devil -  out loud, but you must always tell the truth."

I made the chart with 20 spaces thinking he would have that filled in no time.  Much to our surprise, it has taken him a few months to fill his chart and to our total excitement he has only had to cross out two of his stickers.

Overall, he has been better behaved and there have been times when I've asked him things..

"Owen, did you hit Megan?" (As she was screaming in the other room) He scratched his head (like only my brother Jeremy can do) and looked to the floor and looked to the ceiling and finally burst out, "NO!!! I will tell the truth.  Yes, Mom, I hit Megan" and then burst into tears."

This Mama cried, too.

So Saturday was the big day, he got his last sticker.  The entire family cheered and hugged and celebrated!

 He ordered a Sundae with chocolate and strawberries on top and they were gracious enough to make it for him. :)

 And just because she's so cute.....

I can't tell you how proud we are of Owen.  I hope this has helped him to make a habit of always telling the truth without even thinking.

It's so interesting/difficult/intimidating being a parent and knowing that YOU are responsible for this child making it to Heaven.  We pray daily for wisdom.

So if you've actually gotten to the end of this post - thank you. Owen wanted Grandpa to see. :)

Owen thinks the world of my dad and would often ask to call Grandpa when he got a sticker.  On the other hand, he didn't want Grandpa knowing that he had to cross those two stickers out.  

I'm not posting this because I think we're the perfect parents and have it all in the bag, so to speak.  I just wanted to share what *I* believe God helped us with and publicly thank HIM for His help.  Daily!  We could not do it without Him!

9 comments:

Sharlyn said...

Tears here. So precious. Love all of you so much.
PS I think Owen has impeccable taste in ice cream. :-)

Della said...

SO proud of you, OWEN, for learning such a valuable life lesson. This Grandma cried too! Love you all, Momma D

The Arender's said...

Crystal, I have cried tears over this issue as well. We occasionally have one that struggles in this area. Sometimes I have gotten to the bottom of an issue but it was without true remorse and I haven't known what to do either. Thanks for sharing this. You have a sweet little family!

ALICIA said...

That is a good idea. I think we all probably have at least one with this issue,as it is human instinct for little ones and its hard to tell the truth when they may get disciplined for it. :o/ I have been in that very place with one of mine, I might have to try that!

Liz said...

Tears here too... I'm thankful that Jesus is helping him.

And don't be shy about sharing ideas - I truly value any idea I can come across in the process of finding what will work. Keep sharing - it takes some getting over the "What if's" that all of us have in our mind, but your encouragement to other mothers/women matters. Its part of God's great plan. Titus 2:3-4 ("aged" you are not, but you are older than someone) ;>)

Love you & yours!

Anonymous said...

Owen, we are SOOOO very proud of you and love you so very much! I know it's made Grandpa feel good when you've called ~ SO excited because you got another sticker ~ or asking Grandpa if he's still praying for you! Wish Grandpa would have thought to take a picture when you and him celebrated at Braums the other day!! :) And Crystal, thanks for being brave enough to share! I think it can be a real blessing to other young mommies. Remember, we're all very human . . . and we all need each other! Love you all BUNCHES!!

Mom (and Grandma :))

Julie said...

What a great idea. Thanks for sharing. So glad Owen won his prize. Julie

Anonymous said...

I cried too!!!!! So glad Owen learned a very hard lesson. Thanks for sharing your great idea. I'm sure many of us will need it. Love ya

Mandy said...

Praise the Lord! I am so proud of you Owen!!! Isn't it wonderful when we get to the end of ourselves, God always steps in and takes care of us? Love you all bunches!!!!

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